Ma Prem Nirvano | Interview | Death

Know about ma Prem Nirvano vivek and what she says about osho, what’s her relationship with osho, how she died and much more at Who is Identity.

Who is Ma Prem Nirvano Vivek

Ma Prem Nirvano
Ma Prem Nirvano
NameMa Prem Nirvano
Born19th March, 1949
Died9th December, 1989

Her birthday is March 19th, 1949. She became a Sannyasin in April 1971 and stayed with Osho until 1973. And she is one of Osho’s girlfriend Ma Prem Nirvano Vivek. Here is what osho says About her:

“When I was younger, I had a girlfriend. Then she passed away. But she assured me she would return on her deathbed. And she’s returned. Shashi was the name of the girlfriend. In 1947, she passed away. She was the daughter of Dr. Sharma, a doctor in my village. He is also no longer alive. And now she’s disguised herself as Vivek to look after me. Vivek has no recollection of it. I used to call Shashi Gudiya, and I recently began calling Vivek Gudiya as well, simply to keep things consistent. Life is a huge drama, a great play that continues from one life to the next.”

Ma Prem Nirvano Cause of Death

It was said that she died of a heroin overdose, but no one knew if it was accidental or deliberate. In fact, no one knew whether she died in Bombay or in the ashram, and they simply kept quiet about it. Whatever it was, she appeared to be in excruciating pain on the inside.

Ma Prem Nirvano died unexpectedly on December 9th, 1989. A few individuals arrived to cremate her few hours after she died, in the middle of the night. All of the formalities were performed between her death and her cremation. Osho entered Buddha Hall two days later for his birthday celebration, his last birthday in this body.

Interview with Ma Prem Nirvano

Sudha: Could you tell us about your journey to Osho?

Vivek: Hmm, I’m not sure how I got here… It was 1971, after all. It all started in 1970, when I was living in Frankfurt, Germany. An Indian went into our house one day, and none of us recognised him; he wasn’t a friend of anyone’s; he simply walked in. We all thought he was someone else’s friend, and they thought he was somebody else’s friend and so, and so on.
He only stayed the night, and when we all got together for breakfast the next morning, we all asked to each other, “Well, whooz he?” None of us knew who he was (Vivek laughs at the joke). But he was so sweet and fit in so well with the rest of the family that we all agreed he could stay. We inquired as to how he arrived, and he stated that he was walking by the house and felt compelled to enter, so he did.

He stayed for a few months before deciding to return to India, where he was born. And when he said that, I instantly had the impression, for no apparent reason, that I was going to accompany him. Everyone was stunned when I mentioned that, because I was the kind with a steady career, my own apartment, and…well, I was pretty straight. When they found out I was heading to India, they were ecstatic.

Sudha: I’m going on a date with a complete stranger!

Vivek: Actually, he wasn’t too unusual by then. He was quite pleasant. When it was time for me to leave, folks still didn’t believe me. I packed all of my belongings, sold my apartment, quit my job, and still no one believed I was going. Then the day arrived, and they drove us to the airport, and…I didn’t know why, but I simply had a sense I’d accompany him.

And I had no idea what I was going to do. I figured I’d go to the Himalayas and the mountains at most, but other than that, I had no notion. And then when I got to Bombay…(pause)…I still didn’t know. I was tempted to turn around. And when I arrived in Bombay, the first thing I noticed was a rat! This enormous rat that was sitting right at our feet! It was incredible; it was the first time I’d ever seen a rat.

Sudha: You’d never seen a rat before! God!

Yes, Vivek! I’ve never seen anything like it! Yes. Then we boarded a rickshaw and travelled through Santa Cruz to Bombay, and you know how Santa Cruz smells—ugh! “What am I doing here?” I kept thinking. I had no idea what I was up to! I had no idea why I had come, and it wasn’t for Ravi—the Indian fellow’s name—and it surely wasn’t to visit India. I was in a daze the entire trip, from the moment I made the decision until the moment I met Osho. I was dazed, completely dazed, and I was strolling about Bombay in a stupor.

Everyone was out one day when there was a knock at the door, and there stood an Australian, a Westerner! I was staying at Ravi’s house with his parents, and everyone was out one day when there was a knock at the door, and there stood an Australian, a Westerner! “Come in, come in!” I exclaimed. (laughing again, relieved) I had an instant attraction to him. “Let’s attend to an Acharya Rajneesh lecture,” he remarked later that night. I declined, stating that I did not wish to attend any lectures. “Just come,” he said. Thousands upon thousands of Indians attended a Hindi seminar. “No, I don’t want to go,” I responded, but I went anyway. I’m not sure why I went, but I did.
We arrived a little late, and Osho was already seated on the platform, cross-legged and wearing a shawl. I was in the back row, listening to him talk in Hindi. Thousands of Indians were present! It was in the open, near Churchgate, on the Cross Maidan. From the back, Osho appeared to be a little speck. We moved forward, forward, forward…

Sudha: I can’t take it anymore!

Vivek: (laughs) I moved up close and sat down, and then I went whoops! That was it, that was all there was to it.

Michael, the Australian, nudged me; he had clearly had enough and wanted to leave. I also stated, “Certainly not! I’m sorry, but I’m unable to attend. I have no choice but to stay.” As a result, we stayed until the talk was over. And then I was even more dazed, because this was completely unfamiliar territory for me…this kind of…being. I’m not sure—it was just completely foreign to me.

I was totally smitten. I had no idea what was going on or who this man was. We then returned home. He said the next night, “Mount Abu has a meditation centre. Do you wish to join us?” And, as I stated at the outset, “No way! I’m unable to meditate. They’ll simply kick me out.” “It’s not like that,” he said. “Everyone can come, anyone can come,” he remarked. So we went there, and I noticed these people meditating and practising the Dynamic.

Sudha: Have you completed the Dynamic?

Vivek: I hid in the bushes when I saw these individuals doing the Dynamic. I hid in the bushes for two days! I had no idea what was going on with these people—they were doing all this deep breathing, catharting, and the hoo, leaping up and down, laughing, sobbing, screaming, and going nude! I didn’t understand what was going on.

Then one day, a very large woman approached me—you know who she was; her name was Taru—and said, “The Acharya is seeing that you are doing nothing!” (laughing hysterically and scrunching up in faux terror) Ohhh! “But I can’t do the breathing, I’m totally stuck on the breathing, I can’t do the breathing…” I exclaimed. “The Acharya wants to see you at three-thirty,” she added, her voice forceful. (‘Archarya’ refers to a guy who is a ‘teacher.’) It was Osho’s name before he attracted a large number of disciples and began introducing individuals into sannyas. Later on, he was known as Bhagwan (which means ‘fortunate one.’)

(Oh, ohhhh, ohhhh, ohhhh, ohhhh, ohhhh, ohhhh, ohhhh, oh

Vivek: I was both afraid and excited at the same time. So I went to the Circuit House, where Osho was living, and was instructed to wait for a few minutes by an Indian woman I didn’t know. I went to the door and stood there, and Osho was sitting cross-legged in a chair, wearing only a lunghi, and chatting to an Indian. And as he was talking to the Indian, he looked at me as I stood at the door, and my knees buckled (giggling), and an Indian stood behind me and helped me up. I’m pretty sure I’ve gone limp.

“Are you having problems with the meditations?” Osho asked as I entered. And I stared at him…and then at the sky out the window. I didn’t respond to his query. I couldn’t do it. I wanted to, but I wasn’t able to. For a few minutes, I just stared at the sky. I’m not sure what happened, but I believe I passed out for a few minutes because I can’t recall what happened during that time. I must have returned from…I’m not sure…something. He instructed me on how to perform the meditations. He said something else to me that I don’t recall. That was the end of it.
When we were doing the Hoo (Tratak) another day in the evening, Osho was up on the stage, and something happened that night. I wasn’t yet a sannyasin. When Osho was getting into his car outside after the meditation, he called me over because I was just standing outside and everyone was rushing around him. He motioned for me to come closer and put his arm around my shoulder, saying, “I’m going to invite you to live with me. Come to Bombay, and I’ll put you up with me.” And it was the first time he’d ever made such a statement. He wrapped his arm around my shoulder as he said it, and I just leaned against his chest. It felt like a continuation of something I’d forgotten about…that had suddenly reappeared.

I couldn’t sleep that night. I was just sitting on the balcony when I realised something “Without a doubt! Yessss…” Then I started to unwind in the meditations and at camp. When we were conducting the free expression the next day, which was in the afternoon, I believe one westerner approached me. “You know (warning voice), the Acharya has his eye on you,” she continued. (giggles) She motioned for me to seat closer, so I did, only a few feet away from where he was sitting. Another thing that happened to me was that I started crying for no apparent reason. When you just can’t stop crying, you know what I’m talking about.

Sudha: It’s very beautiful.

Vivek: And you have no idea why you’re sobbing! And you simply sit there, sobbing uncontrollably. With just tears and my snot gushing down (demonstrating how it felt to have a runny nose in Osho’s presence) and slobbering and drooling (laughter ringing through the kitchen). It was also amusing since there was a man sitting next to me who had a handkerchief on the floor—and I desperately wanted that handkerchief! One of my eyes was fixed on this handkerchief. But I couldn’t move my body, let alone my hand, to retrieve this handkerchief. And there I was, staring at myself! I was standing at a distance, staring at myself, and I desperately wanted to get that handkerchief but couldn’t, and I was sobbing uncontrollably.

Sudha: Have you ever had something like that happen to you before?

Vivek: No way, no how. Everything was new to me. That camp was nothing but explosions after explosions; something happened every day. I had no idea what was going on, but I simply let everything happen—everything seemed so lovely, so I just let it all in. And I simply stayed there after that particular experience of just crying and crying, of just seeing my mind and seeing my body, and after the meditation. It was all mountainous and hilly. And one girl approached me and inquired about what was going on, and…it was…(Vivek is speechless at this point) absolutely beyond anything I had read or felt. That’s how I got started. After that, I returned to Bombay and took sannyas.

Sudha: Had you consciously remembered anything about your previous encounters with Osho at that point?

No, not of being with Osho. Vivek: Some days after I took sannyas, he gave his room, in his bedroom, English lectures. There were so few people, perhaps thirty. All of us were gathered in a room, and suddenly… There were so many people and everyone spoke, talked, spoke. I’ve only been sitting on a bed. Anything has gone click! (Vivek acts with her hands, something like a flip-over in her stomach). It was shopping, shuush, and I suddenly came in. And that was.. (here we all laugh, I comment about the flip-flop that my own belly just did). I had a past life experience then; it wasn’t with Osho. I knew nothing about past lives.

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